(written sometime Wednesday night)
Good god it makes me frustrated. No wonder L is the way she is. I’ve been at her house for a full day and I have a constant headache from the constant annoying mixture of voices that are always always always shouting through the house. No one sees any need to be quiet. It’s 11pm on a school night. They have a freshman. He hasn’t done his homework. He’s playing Halo in the living room. L, her mom, her 18-year old brother and her two friends are playing Uno in the kitchen. Both are loud. The dad is sleeping, somehow.
They waste away their lives.
I have met so many people in the past 24 hours I can’t name them all. Better yet, I can’t name a single one, save L, who is going to a state school. The rest go to community colleges. And really, that number is rather small since most of her friends just smoke pot and bum off their parents. Most are about 20 years old.
It’s pathetic.
This is middle class. I didn’t know there was such a difference between middle- and upper-middle-class, but there is. Teenage pregnancies exist here. Pot is the drug of choice, but it’s not just used by a select group of people. Alcohol is so freely talked about. The dad had like four beers before heading to bed. Four. I never saw him without a beer in his hand tonight. The kids all talk about their adventures with alcohol in front of their parents without concern. One of L’s friends whom I’ve met a few times, B, speaks of a “wonderful float trip” she went on. She doesn’t remember it. When asked how could it be good if she doesn’t remember that, I am given an incredulous stare. “I don’t remember it. That’s what makes it an awesome weekend.”
Uh…right…
I didn’t realize how blessed I was to have intelligent friends whose concerns extend further than gossip about the latest boyfriend of their high school slut. I mean really, who the hell cares what Christy McCarthy is up to these days? Okay, so I might have gone too far there. But you get my point, right? We have concerns about our future. They are concerned about what she said he said that he heard from his girlfriend who heard it from her younger sister’s best friend who read it through text from her latest boy-toy…do any of you CA people know about this? I can’t believe this world exists and I am seriously reconsidering my friendship with L after this. These are the people she is really friends with and who have shaped her. Maybe I don’t actually know her as well as I thought. Maybe this is who she really is. And maybe I don’t like it one bit.
A word to those on the west coast: heed my warning, fly over this part of the country. I finally understand why they call it that. There’s nothing good that could ever come from here.
8.21.2009
Following the Rules
I don't remember what it felt like to go against the rules set out by my parents for me. I don't remember if it was fun or if I defied them often or what my punishments were. I do know what it is like to speed down a road, 20 or 30 miles over the speed limit and get away with it. The instant fear when you get caught and the adrenaline that pulses through your veins, causing you to shake uncontrollably at your boyfriend's townhome for 15 minutes after you get out of that ticket. I imagine going against the rules to be something like that.
I can't say I enjoyed how it felt, though it certainly was exciting. Maybe people like this, I suppose, otherwise they wouldn't break the law all the time.
I speak, of course, from experience.
My lovely apartmentmates have a habit of going against the law. From smoking to drinking, I have gotten used to their shenanigans and tolerate them to the best of my abilities. One thing I cannot stand, however, is when they put other people at risk.
Like before, when the apartment was one boy and three girls. An apartmentmate wanted another person to live with us and to have a dog. Both are against the lease so I had to say that it wouldn't happen. This person got very mad at me and eventually decided to leave the apartment. This drama was very long and drawn out and painful for me. I lost a friend over it and possibly got on the nerves of a current apartmentmate. But this troublemaker moved out and I thought the worst of my problems were over.
And now we have two illegal pets living in our apartment. One is a cat. A cat for crying out loud. They were grumpy about me even asking if I could have my five pound dwarf rabbit at the apartment, yet this girl (all living at the apartment now are girls so it doesn't tell you anything) thinks that they will allow her to have a cat and some sort of reptile. Reptile maybe. But they have to approve any and all pets. So...fat chance.
The problem I forsee is that she has already bought everything the cat would need. Food, litter box, extra litter, a blanket for it to sleep on. It has everything. And all these things are supposed to fit into her room which is already full to the brim. Yeah. Right. And what happens if the apartment says she can't keep it? she won't get rid of the cat, not after she bought all that crap. And her lizard? Well...we'll see. I've requested to go with her to the management to make sure these pets are allowed under the pretense that I want to see if I can bring my bunny. I think this is a good way to involve myself without making it seem like I'm taking the other side. I'm not, I just want us to live legally.
I just never expected it to be this difficult to accomplish.
I understand the appeal of not following the rules. I just don't understand why people are selfish enough that they must put their thrills above the safety and security of others. I want a place to live. Is that so much to ask?
I can't say I enjoyed how it felt, though it certainly was exciting. Maybe people like this, I suppose, otherwise they wouldn't break the law all the time.
I speak, of course, from experience.
My lovely apartmentmates have a habit of going against the law. From smoking to drinking, I have gotten used to their shenanigans and tolerate them to the best of my abilities. One thing I cannot stand, however, is when they put other people at risk.
Like before, when the apartment was one boy and three girls. An apartmentmate wanted another person to live with us and to have a dog. Both are against the lease so I had to say that it wouldn't happen. This person got very mad at me and eventually decided to leave the apartment. This drama was very long and drawn out and painful for me. I lost a friend over it and possibly got on the nerves of a current apartmentmate. But this troublemaker moved out and I thought the worst of my problems were over.
And now we have two illegal pets living in our apartment. One is a cat. A cat for crying out loud. They were grumpy about me even asking if I could have my five pound dwarf rabbit at the apartment, yet this girl (all living at the apartment now are girls so it doesn't tell you anything) thinks that they will allow her to have a cat and some sort of reptile. Reptile maybe. But they have to approve any and all pets. So...fat chance.
The problem I forsee is that she has already bought everything the cat would need. Food, litter box, extra litter, a blanket for it to sleep on. It has everything. And all these things are supposed to fit into her room which is already full to the brim. Yeah. Right. And what happens if the apartment says she can't keep it? she won't get rid of the cat, not after she bought all that crap. And her lizard? Well...we'll see. I've requested to go with her to the management to make sure these pets are allowed under the pretense that I want to see if I can bring my bunny. I think this is a good way to involve myself without making it seem like I'm taking the other side. I'm not, I just want us to live legally.
I just never expected it to be this difficult to accomplish.
I understand the appeal of not following the rules. I just don't understand why people are selfish enough that they must put their thrills above the safety and security of others. I want a place to live. Is that so much to ask?
8.20.2009
Hitchhikers Guide to I-70
(written Monday evening)
I never know what to do when I see hitchhikers. Should I stop and pick them up, offer them a ride? Should I pass them by, writing them off as creepers and killers? I saw a guy, probably in his mid twenties, looking for a ride just outside of Indianapolis on I-70 heading west. He looked nice enough, fairly clean with only a backpack as far as luggage went. I slowed down to about 50 (speed limit 70, so you know I was going at least 75) for almost a mile, just wondering if I should stop and walk back to him and offer him a ride. I was going to St Louis, which is the next major city along I-70. It was the least I could do to help him on his way.
I ended up being honked at so I pulled into the slow lane and collected my thoughts. But for the next hour I could not stop thinking about this hitchhiker. Did he find a ride? Did he have a decent place to sleep? Where was he heading? Was he a killer or would he have had interesting stories to keep me entertained until my destination?
I’ll never know. I don’t pick up hitchhikers while driving alone.
I never know what to do when I see hitchhikers. Should I stop and pick them up, offer them a ride? Should I pass them by, writing them off as creepers and killers? I saw a guy, probably in his mid twenties, looking for a ride just outside of Indianapolis on I-70 heading west. He looked nice enough, fairly clean with only a backpack as far as luggage went. I slowed down to about 50 (speed limit 70, so you know I was going at least 75) for almost a mile, just wondering if I should stop and walk back to him and offer him a ride. I was going to St Louis, which is the next major city along I-70. It was the least I could do to help him on his way.
I ended up being honked at so I pulled into the slow lane and collected my thoughts. But for the next hour I could not stop thinking about this hitchhiker. Did he find a ride? Did he have a decent place to sleep? Where was he heading? Was he a killer or would he have had interesting stories to keep me entertained until my destination?
I’ll never know. I don’t pick up hitchhikers while driving alone.
8.14.2009
Relationships in College: Part 1
Allow me to be upfront about this. I have no idea how many parts this will be or how lengthy you can expect said unknown number of parts to be. I don't know when I will post these, but don't expect them to be one after another. I only have personal experience with one long distance relationship, travel time in hours ranging from slightly over one to an average of six hours (all one way, of course). I have observed many types of college relationships, however, since my roommate and other people living in the dorms turned out to be quite good subjects.
Allow me to give you a roadmap. I shall be covering one on (long distance relationships) and three (possibly four if I have time) off. See what I did there debate nerds? Oh how I make myself laugh sometimes...
Long distance relationships in college are tough. It's not so bad if your colleges are only an hour or two apart. When you're that close, shelling out the gas money to see each other that weekend isn't too much of a big deal. I mean, of course it matters and is always appreciated, but compared to when a one-way trip is 6 hours (give or take a time zone) and about a full tank of gas (K claims he's made it just under a tank, but he gets 10 MPG better than I do and drives a lot slower getting to my university), well...there really is no comparison.
I'm not too sure what exactly I'm supposed to say. There's no set way to make a long distance relationship work. Most of the time, it doesn't work. You see each other two times a month at best and the breaks have to be split between bf-gf time and family time and that makes both parties frustrated (and you have to attend both family get-togethers...thank goodness I don't have much family out here, there's no way we'd be able to work that out).
People and websites will tell you that communication is key. It's bullshit. In college, you're always online. Via cell phone or laptop you're on Facebook and Twitter and some form of an instant messaging client. Webcams are built into about 50% of laptops and the PC lovers have probably had some form of a webcam for 3 years so the use of Skype is rampant. Failing internet service there is texting and [gasp] phone calls. It's when you're face-to-face that you stop trying so hard to communicate and things get misunderstood.
Not seeing each other gets difficult. I don't want to go into detail (no, nothing more than PG rated, don't you guys go thinking like that), but you really do miss just being around your SO. There's no way to get over that. You just have to deal with it.
I'm the only one I know out of all my friends - both Midwest states and California combined - that went into her first year of college with a boyfriend and came out with the same one. No, scratch that. I know of another. But she is no longer in a long distance relationship because she moved back to her hometown to take community college classes there. I'm happy for her that she could make that choice, but it's not one I would ever make. Anyway, back to the point. Most broke it off before college. I can think of one that attempted it. Two hours apart. I can't explain to you why these relationships ended, only speculate. And I have...a lot. But space will not be wasted on that, especially because I don't know the truth.
One of my very good friends, ex-neighbor, N, is entering college this year. She's going to Duke to study pre-med. She does plan to become a doctor, but she's also interested in prosthesis and rehabilitation, so a bit of tech is mixed in there. She will go into college with a boyfriend at the U of Maryland. Google Maps says it's 4 hours. She says it's 5. I don't know the traffic, so I'll give her the benefit - they'll probably have to pass around D.C. However, this couple is talking about using planes for travel. Since both colleges are relatively close to major airports and flights to and from are cheap (only slightly more expensive than driving, depending on gas prices) and easy to get, they plan to cut down on travel time and fly to see each other. It's a decent trade-off and I am looking forward to seeing how it will work out.
So that's it. My advice is as follows. Before you leave for college, ask yourself if you want to stay with this person. If you have doubt, end the relationship. It's not good to drag the other person along until you find their replacement locally. If you stay together, make sure you know what you're getting into, that you know where your limits are and how much you can deal with. Keep in touch, but keep your freedom. Try to make a plan with your SO before you leave...it probably won't be followed, but it'll make you feel better about the situation going into it.
Allow me to give you a roadmap. I shall be covering one on (long distance relationships) and three (possibly four if I have time) off. See what I did there debate nerds? Oh how I make myself laugh sometimes...
Long distance relationships in college are tough. It's not so bad if your colleges are only an hour or two apart. When you're that close, shelling out the gas money to see each other that weekend isn't too much of a big deal. I mean, of course it matters and is always appreciated, but compared to when a one-way trip is 6 hours (give or take a time zone) and about a full tank of gas (K claims he's made it just under a tank, but he gets 10 MPG better than I do and drives a lot slower getting to my university), well...there really is no comparison.
I'm not too sure what exactly I'm supposed to say. There's no set way to make a long distance relationship work. Most of the time, it doesn't work. You see each other two times a month at best and the breaks have to be split between bf-gf time and family time and that makes both parties frustrated (and you have to attend both family get-togethers...thank goodness I don't have much family out here, there's no way we'd be able to work that out).
People and websites will tell you that communication is key. It's bullshit. In college, you're always online. Via cell phone or laptop you're on Facebook and Twitter and some form of an instant messaging client. Webcams are built into about 50% of laptops and the PC lovers have probably had some form of a webcam for 3 years so the use of Skype is rampant. Failing internet service there is texting and [gasp] phone calls. It's when you're face-to-face that you stop trying so hard to communicate and things get misunderstood.
Not seeing each other gets difficult. I don't want to go into detail (no, nothing more than PG rated, don't you guys go thinking like that), but you really do miss just being around your SO. There's no way to get over that. You just have to deal with it.
I'm the only one I know out of all my friends - both Midwest states and California combined - that went into her first year of college with a boyfriend and came out with the same one. No, scratch that. I know of another. But she is no longer in a long distance relationship because she moved back to her hometown to take community college classes there. I'm happy for her that she could make that choice, but it's not one I would ever make. Anyway, back to the point. Most broke it off before college. I can think of one that attempted it. Two hours apart. I can't explain to you why these relationships ended, only speculate. And I have...a lot. But space will not be wasted on that, especially because I don't know the truth.
One of my very good friends, ex-neighbor, N, is entering college this year. She's going to Duke to study pre-med. She does plan to become a doctor, but she's also interested in prosthesis and rehabilitation, so a bit of tech is mixed in there. She will go into college with a boyfriend at the U of Maryland. Google Maps says it's 4 hours. She says it's 5. I don't know the traffic, so I'll give her the benefit - they'll probably have to pass around D.C. However, this couple is talking about using planes for travel. Since both colleges are relatively close to major airports and flights to and from are cheap (only slightly more expensive than driving, depending on gas prices) and easy to get, they plan to cut down on travel time and fly to see each other. It's a decent trade-off and I am looking forward to seeing how it will work out.
So that's it. My advice is as follows. Before you leave for college, ask yourself if you want to stay with this person. If you have doubt, end the relationship. It's not good to drag the other person along until you find their replacement locally. If you stay together, make sure you know what you're getting into, that you know where your limits are and how much you can deal with. Keep in touch, but keep your freedom. Try to make a plan with your SO before you leave...it probably won't be followed, but it'll make you feel better about the situation going into it.
8.12.2009
Girl Say What, Say What?
I know I am a college student. I am an adult. I do not know how this happened.
Over the past year I have become a Disney channel addict.
I admit it. It's great entertainment for when you need a study break, and decent background noise for when you actually are studying. The storylines are simple enough for you to follow along without really paying much attention anyway.
It started out as just watching the nightly movie. Then it turned into watching whatever was on after the movie. Then I would turn it on late at night to see if any of the older shows that I watched were on. That's how I got hooked on Life With Derek, a modern Canadian version of the Brady Bunch. Then, one lazy Saturday afternoon, my good friend, L, was channel surfing and was intrigued by a funny theme song - Suite Life on Deck. We fell in love with the twin brother's silly escapades, the sweet country girl's innocence and the dumb heiress's witty one-liners. Pretty soon anytime I had the TV on, I was watching Disney channel.
At the same time, my boyfriend was developing a similar addiction. He heard a Miley Cyrus song on the radio and, in his nerdy fashion, set up his computer to record Hannah Montana any time it happened to be on. One time he happened to watch the show on after, Wizards on Waverly Place. Thus his obsession began.
Soon Disney introduced a new show - Sonny With a Chance - and shortly after, thanks to the success of the JoBros - Jonas. Though neither of these warranted the attention of Life With Derek (for me) or Hannah Montana (for him), they were not to be flipped past should they be on.
This all being said, I just happened to watch Miley's performance at the Teen Choice Awards on YouTube. I'm kind of appalled. She pole danced on a pushable ice cream cart! You could see her mesh bra when she danced! And let's not forget that she CAN NOT sing to save her life (those JoBros though....they're decent singers when the younger two aren't off breaking hearts). On the other hand...she's almost 17. I danced like her when I was 17. Not on stage at an award's show, but I danced like her, and raunchier too. My junior prom I wore a more revealing dress and my bra showed sometimes. But it wasn't indecent. She wasn't indecent...was she? (link if you wanna check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRrwPAM2LuU&NR=1)
I guess my only complaint is that I hold these Disney Channel "stars" up to a higher standard. Demi (who performed at our state fair just two days ago), Selena, Miley, all three of the Jonases...they should be extra careful. Yes, sometimes that means no fun. Nick should stop dating for a while - or at least stop dating Selena and Miley. Miley should cover up and be more professional (have you seen her interviews?). Joe should stop dating high profile people or at least not write songs about them. But then so should Taylor Swift...actually she can just go hide in a cave for the rest of her life. Country/Pop can live without her. (side note: heard her three times today at the state fair...had to slap boyfriend to get him to stop humming along.) Demi's not well enough known to really need to watch out and Selena seems to have learned her lesson after the whole Selena/Miley/Nick thing.
And after that last paragraph I realized I read way too many teen magazines and spend way too much time on YouTube watching whatever they have on their front page for my own good. But it's late. And I don't mind being candid with you guys. You'll still love meeeee. Right? C's lucky. She got out with just High School Musical and the JoBros. I've been pulled in and I don't think there's a way out.
FYI, decent Disney artists in my book: Jonas Brothers (Paranoid = love), Mitchel Musso (In Crowd = sing along), Demi Levato (dat girl got lungs!).
Over the past year I have become a Disney channel addict.
I admit it. It's great entertainment for when you need a study break, and decent background noise for when you actually are studying. The storylines are simple enough for you to follow along without really paying much attention anyway.
It started out as just watching the nightly movie. Then it turned into watching whatever was on after the movie. Then I would turn it on late at night to see if any of the older shows that I watched were on. That's how I got hooked on Life With Derek, a modern Canadian version of the Brady Bunch. Then, one lazy Saturday afternoon, my good friend, L, was channel surfing and was intrigued by a funny theme song - Suite Life on Deck. We fell in love with the twin brother's silly escapades, the sweet country girl's innocence and the dumb heiress's witty one-liners. Pretty soon anytime I had the TV on, I was watching Disney channel.
At the same time, my boyfriend was developing a similar addiction. He heard a Miley Cyrus song on the radio and, in his nerdy fashion, set up his computer to record Hannah Montana any time it happened to be on. One time he happened to watch the show on after, Wizards on Waverly Place. Thus his obsession began.
Soon Disney introduced a new show - Sonny With a Chance - and shortly after, thanks to the success of the JoBros - Jonas. Though neither of these warranted the attention of Life With Derek (for me) or Hannah Montana (for him), they were not to be flipped past should they be on.
This all being said, I just happened to watch Miley's performance at the Teen Choice Awards on YouTube. I'm kind of appalled. She pole danced on a pushable ice cream cart! You could see her mesh bra when she danced! And let's not forget that she CAN NOT sing to save her life (those JoBros though....they're decent singers when the younger two aren't off breaking hearts). On the other hand...she's almost 17. I danced like her when I was 17. Not on stage at an award's show, but I danced like her, and raunchier too. My junior prom I wore a more revealing dress and my bra showed sometimes. But it wasn't indecent. She wasn't indecent...was she? (link if you wanna check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRrwPAM2LuU&NR=1)
I guess my only complaint is that I hold these Disney Channel "stars" up to a higher standard. Demi (who performed at our state fair just two days ago), Selena, Miley, all three of the Jonases...they should be extra careful. Yes, sometimes that means no fun. Nick should stop dating for a while - or at least stop dating Selena and Miley. Miley should cover up and be more professional (have you seen her interviews?). Joe should stop dating high profile people or at least not write songs about them. But then so should Taylor Swift...actually she can just go hide in a cave for the rest of her life. Country/Pop can live without her. (side note: heard her three times today at the state fair...had to slap boyfriend to get him to stop humming along.) Demi's not well enough known to really need to watch out and Selena seems to have learned her lesson after the whole Selena/Miley/Nick thing.
And after that last paragraph I realized I read way too many teen magazines and spend way too much time on YouTube watching whatever they have on their front page for my own good. But it's late. And I don't mind being candid with you guys. You'll still love meeeee. Right? C's lucky. She got out with just High School Musical and the JoBros. I've been pulled in and I don't think there's a way out.
FYI, decent Disney artists in my book: Jonas Brothers (Paranoid = love), Mitchel Musso (In Crowd = sing along), Demi Levato (dat girl got lungs!).
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