9.19.2009

Relationships in College: Part 2

I don't understand the draw of the friends with benefits. Well, ok, I do, but I don't see why anyone would want that. To me it seems like it would just lead into a big bad mess and you lose someone who was a friend or someone you could have had an actual relationship with.

But it seems that being friends with benefits is the name of the game these days. A and J, who used to date claim they are just friends now, but they are always all snuggley and holding hands. (update on that situation: A and J had a fight apparently over the friends with benefits situation. They are no longer friends.) R found a nice boy named P and almost started dating him until she figured out all he wanted was sex. So they stopped seeing each other...for all of a week. He's over right now. They're locked in her room. K recently broke up with her boyfriend and has been going on a lot of dates, but seems to like this one boy that she knew before...

What is the appeal of that? Just having someone familiar? Why not just causally date then? It's not a bad thing to be boyfriend and girlfriend, especially if that's what you want (in R's case, and in K's case too). You don't have to get all formal and serious about a relationship. It'll last a month or so and you can move on to the next one. Just for propriety's sake...say you're in a relationship! It's not that bad I promise! Well...no, let's not go there, my relationship issues have nothing to do with turning a friends with benefits situation into a casual relationship.

I dunno...it just kind of bugs me, I guess. I can see these girls, even if they aren't my friends, getting hurt. They put themselves in these situations and I can see how it's wrong or it's not what they want, but they do it anyway. I want to help but I don't know how to. Any advice? Should I just butt out?

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