Defriended

It's a strange thing for someone like me to deal with losing a friend. I mean, yeah, sometimes it happens. But it's not supposed to happen like this.

I know I wrote on here that I'd never speak to K again. But that was then. He and I became friends and over this winter break we were super close, but drifted a bit at the start of the school year. When I went home this weekend, I had dinner with him and his 3 roommates. And watched the two latest episodes of Chuck. And talked about my relationship. And when I left, I felt confident he and I were still awesome friends.

Then it's the next morning and I'm on Facebook and I don't see any posts from him, which is weird b/c he chronically posts. So I go check his page. And I can't see his wall. Oh, hey, I've been defriended. So I shoot him an email asking why. I know it's not a mistake that I've been defriended and it's okay, I'll put up with the minor insult, just tell me why. I get "Good bye" in return and when I send a "What? No! Why?" his way, I receive notification that I've been blocked and my emails will go straight to the trash. Oh. Do I dare even try the phone? I send the same message via text. No reply after 4 hours. I call him. One ring, then voicemail.

I honestly have no clue how to handle this. The logical part of my brain is winning and I haven't done anything, but the angry part is telling me to drive to his college and demand he explain himself. Or at least contact his military-to-be roommate and get him to kick K's butt. Another part thinks this will blow over in a week and it'll all be okay. But my fear is that it won't. Regardless of how the romantic relationship wound up, this kid was my closest friend in Indiana for four years and I'm not one to just give up on a friend, even if all signs are saying to. J can attest to this. You can tell me not to be friends with you and I just won't care. If I say we're friends then we're friends, damn it. I don't care if you like it or not.

But there is really so little I can do in this case. That's the part that's driving me the most insane. Not the not knowing why. Not the timing. Not the supposed reasoning. The fact that I am powerless to change this is what's upsetting me. I am powerless to help my friend.